It was today. One year ago exactly today I had my toe amputated. And I thought of a tradition.
Shortly before I had my toe amputated I made a painting. I did a purple background, all swirlie and fantastic. Then, I painted my left foot blue and stamped it on the painting. I had planned to create another version of it a few months after the amputation, but never got around to it. The base coat of the painting is drying downstairs and I’m waiting to attempt to stamp my foot again. I’ve tried it twice already and both times the base coat was still too wet. I’ve set a timer and in 18 minutes it should be dry enough.
That’s my tradition. Every year on August 17 I will create a new piece of foot art. Just some painting or sculpture or whatever that requires the use of my foot to create it. I decided against starting a new charity project every year since that would get overwhelming really fast. I can handle art, though. I just wish it’d dry faster cause I want to paint my foot again. It feels really weird, but interesting. Who knew acrylics would feel so cold. And once my foot’s blue it accentuates the movement, so I can see the movement of my bones in more detail. It’s really amazing, you should try painting your foot some time. 🙂
So, I should shortly have a set of two paintings, same size, same general colors, only difference will be the lack of a toe. I think it could be pretty cool. I’m thinking of doing a set of my right foot (only with all the toes intact), and a set of my hands. Then, they can all be one big huge set of paintings. It’d be great.
I’m glad I went through the whole upheaval of emotions last night over the toe thing. I wasn’t expecting it, but I feel that if I’m going to get depressed I should do it at night, that way it doesn’t kill the whole day. The only thing that’s at risk then would be having bad dreams. Thankfully I managed to avoid that last night by watching a few episodes of ‘Pete and Pete’ and ‘Daria’ before I finally went to sleep. It made me laugh enough that I had really wonderful dreams, in fact. I dreamt that I went to London with my father, but I was much older… and much richer. I was buying a house, supposedly Sir John Soane’s house in Lincoln’s Inn Fields, even though it looked nothing like the real house. It was certainly gorgeous, though, and it felt great to be buying it. 🙂 MmmmMmmm, it was so lovely. There was one massive living room area with two-storey ceilings, marble inlaid floors, wainscoting, elaborately carved ceilings and chair-railing, and a gigantic staircase at the end. It felt great to be buying a home like that, to actually know I would be living in it. I hope I get to experience that in real life eventually.
I’ve felt pretty sick all day so I basically just ran a whole butt-load of diagnostics on my laptop (it’s been misbehaving) and read ‘The Lord of the Rings.’ I did have to go move some furniture around at 2 in the afternoon, which was really miserable. Not only did I feel like crap, but it was over 90 degrees outside and so humid it felt like I was drowning. No fun at all. Right now I’m feeling a little better, but I’m still not sure if I’ll be able to make it to church tomorrow.
Dang it all, I’m getting nothing but junk mail today. (Sorry, that may seem random, but I just checked my mail again.) I’ve gotten about 30 crap emails and only 1 from a real person. Oh, but I did get something nice in the regular post today. 🙂 Joinee Whitby from the Join-Me.co.uk collective sent me a great Join Me button (the kind you pin to stuff). It was oh so very nice of him to mail it to me all the way from England. I’ve added it to the back of my rucksack, along with a charming button from Hot Topic – “I caught you picking your nose.” It was only 50 cents. 🙂 Lady-like, eh?
So, I found my tradition, I still feel kinda sick, and I’m still not entirely happy about losing the lawsuit. But I got some stuff out of my system that needed to get out. It had been stuck up inside me for way too long, I needed to rant. I’m just kind of sorry it ended up on my blog, but oh well. Such is life, and I’m not going to delete it. Maybe there’s some grand purpose behind the babble of last night. I really didn’t mean for it all to come tumbling out. I even had a few happy things I wanted to say, but I’ve forgotten what they were. Never mind, now I’m getting babbly again. All in all, read it but I’m not proud of it. There are plenty of things I could have done that I could be more embarrassed about, so I’m just not going to worry about some stupid rant.
And woohoo! Looks like my painting should be dry by now. Off I go to paint my foot. 🙂