–singing–

Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Steeeeeeeven! Happy birthday toooo yooooooou!


–/singing–

Today is officially my brother Steven’s 21st birthday! Isn’t that exciting?! *I’m* really excited about it because I’ve been dying to give him his birthday present for AGES, and now I’ll finally be able to give it to him tonight. Hoorah! I love when I happen to find a gift for someone that gets me just as excited about giving a gift as I would be to receive it. That’s when you know things are going to go really well when it comes time to unwrap the gifts. 🙂 Now I just hope Steve loves it.

I think I should at least try to sleep now. I’ve got another really bad headache and I can’t find my medications. They’re somewhere in my suitcase, wherever that is in this house… So I watched an old Veronica Lake movie – “Sullivan’s Travels” – and now I’m talking to Leland.

OH! Speaking of movies, before I forget, I updated my “Movies Everyone Should See, According to Me” list! I think I added three or four movies, as well as some comments on ones already on the list. This came to be because A) I was bored, and B) I made the mistake of adding more DVDs to my Amazon Wish List. Tee hee. I think this Christmas may be nothing but movies, movies, and more movies. Anyway, here’s the list.

One last exciting thing to mention: I watched that TCM special about Rita Hayworth this evening. My family recorded it for me while I was away in Denver. When I first heard about the documentary I was thrilled, considering my recent decision that I wanted to be most like Rita Hayworth as far as her qualifications as an “Anonymous One”. I watched it and it was remarkable to me how many bad traits I have in common with Rita. The most shocking being that I have a penchant for falling in love with controlling, manipulative, or needy men. That trait got Rita in trouble a lot; she suffered through five marriages because of it. Also, the one thing she wanted most out of life was a loving, safe, secure family of her own. And, most surprising of all, she was 5’6″ too! 🙂 Okay, so that wasn’t quite as revealing as the similar tendencies toward relationships, and emotional wants and needs, but oh well. It’s rather sad that she never found a way out of those pitfalls; that sense of always being used for someone else’s agenda. They used a phrase in that documentary, “Dinner was always on Rita.” That really seems to fit a lot of experiences I’ve had in life. Of course, nothing to the degree of her life, but just rather scary similarities.


Of course, I still hope that maybe one day I’ll share some of her good traits as well. She was beautiful, graceful, a brilliant dancer and actress, and from what I heard in the documentary, a very kind-hearted woman and a good mother. While washing my hair this evening I got to thinking about who I would ideally like to be. I’ve come up with a list of what I want from whom:

– The poise and eloquence of Grace Kelly


– The figure of Marilyn Monroe


– The wit and spunk of Katharine Hepburn


– The balance of power and femininity of Emma Peel/Diana Rigg


– The innocence of Audrey Hepburn


– The unique attraction of Lauren Bacall


– The allure and grace of Rita Hayworth

That would be my ideal for who I would like to be, a mix of all those qualities from all of those remarkable women. Now I just hope that I can somehow, after learning about Rita’s life, avoid the mistakes she made emotionally. I think maybe if I’m aware of my tendencies that I don’t agree with, maybe that will make me more able to contradict them. I can hope so anyway.

I went cruising on eBay earlier, looking for old movie paraphenalia, and I found a really cute vintage ad for Lustre Creme Shampoo which featured Rita Hayworth. It was only $6.00 so I bid on it, and I won the auction! I think I’ll frame it and put it up near my bedroom door as a reminder; everytime I leave my room I’ll remember what not to do, and what to aim for. Sounds like a plan, doesn’t it? I think for right this minute, though, I’d better get some sleep before I launch into another introspective thread. 🙂