So I haven’t blogged in a while… I know. I’m guilty. I kind of let that “typing one-handed” excuse get carried away and I know it. I got my typing abilities back a while ago, thanks to a new ingenius way of bandaging my hand that kept my thumb immobile while still allowing my other four fingers freedom of movement. I swear, that conglomeration of gauze, tape, and insane amounts of neosporin was a work of art and should qualify me for at least a nobel prize of some sort. But anyway. I got to thinking and I realized I should blog, because hey, I actually have some things to say for a change besides more updates on various creative ways that I’ve injured myself. (Don’t worry, I haven’t actually injured myself since the thumb, but I’m still waiting for the other shoe in Imelda Marcos’ Closet O’ Crap-Droppin’ Shoes to drop. Oh yeah, you know what I’m talking about, cause it’s not just one shoe, it’s not just the traditional pair of dropped shoes, ooooh no, in my case it’s shoe after shoe after shoe after bloody freakish shoe. Therefore I can only assume that the infamous Imelda is at fault. I’m blaming her for all of my problems from here on out. Fair warning.)

    Anyway. I realized that – surprise! – it’s unbelievably close to Christmas. How did it sneak up so fast? I’m prepared and all, sorta, it’s just that time somehow sped up without the traditional onset of holiday cheer for me, so it was a shock. With all the bad luck I just find it hard to believe that it’s the most wonderful time of the year, hence I find it hard to believe that Christmas is really this weekend. But I digress (I’m doing that a lot in this entry… sorry). With the Big Holiday coming up this weekend, that means I need to do two things very quickly – A) come up with a Bloggy Christmas present that in some way humiliates me, and B) get out a special holiday episode of the Podcast. The podcast I think I can manage – I have a remarkably old school offensive Punch & Judy Christmas Special I’ve been waiting to unleash on you, the unsuspecting public, so I think I’ll just go ahead and use that. But as for the Bloggy Christmas Present, I don’t know. Traditionally it has always been me singing some terribly silly song – either the song itself is silly, or I sing it in a profoundly stupid way, thus the inherent humiliation. But I dunno, I feel like that’s already been done. On the way home from dinner tonight with the family, we started joking about the two desserts I ordered to go (we had money left on the gift card, so why not?). One thing led to another, and somehow I ended up making up a rather funny song about getting fat. I’m quite proud of the chorus. It was so good that even my giggle-singing couldn’t stop me from making up extra verses, and soon everyone else was either laughing or singing along. So I’ve already done my humiliation singing, and unless you all really want to hear my new one hit wonder, “Cause I Ate the Cookies”, I just don’t know what I’ll do for the Bloggy Christmas Present this year.

    That means I’m taking suggestions. Is there something in particular you’ve been wanting? Something you asked Santa for, but sadly can only be delivered via someone else’s blog? (If so, that’s gotta be some weird, random wish – nice going!) Leave me a comment and let me know what you want this year from me, your humble blogging servant. Just be sure to keep it PG rated, guys, there are a few kids present!

    Now on to the other thing I wanted to tell you all about. I’ve found a new show on TV! And guess what! They also show it on the Internet – for free! I love this new TV band wagon of streaming shows for free online, it’s fantastic. It means if I miss an episode, that’s okay, I can just watch it the next night on my laptop, which allows me to curl up in bed in my pajamas and veg away in a whole new way! (Hey, there I go making rhymes again… now if I could just write a catchy tune, I might have a new hit!)

    Um, anyway, there I go digressing again. What makes this show so great, apart from the fact that they stream it online, is that it’s surprisingly similar to my life in many ways, and thus I feel all warm and fuzzy when I watch it, and I chuckle happily when they pull jokes or sitcom pranks that are reminiscent of various memories I hold dear. (One… Two… Three… Awwww!) I’m not usually a huge fan of sitcoms; I find them too predictable and forced thanks to the half-hour time constraints paired with the typical insulting laugh tracks. But thankfully, I think this one is pretty good. It’s not your typical down-your-throat kind of humor, there are no laugh tracks, and it’s generally just fun to watch. But what makes it so special for me is that it’s about a young woman, all of her guy friends, and how having such friends impacts her dating life. If it weren’t for the fact that the young woman is a sports writer and a huge baseball fan, I’d swear they’d just taken my life and made it a sitcom.

    Oh wait… I do like sports… replace baseball with Formula 1 and it’s my life. Wow… I’m more masculine than I thought. Crap. All her analogies on the show, I could replace them with metaphors about drivers, engineers, and pit crews, and it would all be completely the same! Okay, now I’m mad, who stole my life and made a sitcom out of it?! I deserve a cut of the profits! Hehe.

    I started watching it last week, got all caught up on the few episodes I’d missed thanks to the website, and now I’m hooked. I love it. It makes me giggle, and it reminds me of all the wonderful men in my life that I’m blessed to count as my best friends. Watching them play their traditional poker game reminded me of playing BS only a few short weeks ago with Alastair in Scotland. (You know, that card game Baseball Shots. Umm, Bambi Snot… no… Barbie School… nope… oh right! That’s it, Bullshit. Sorry, had to say it, for the sake of those who have yet to hear of that fantastic card game. It’s oh so much fun!) Hehe, anyway, there I go again. I think you all should check the show out – it won’t take long, just head on over to the site here, and spend a little while watching ‘My Boys‘. It’s fun, or at least, I like to think it is. And best of all, no commercials! Wheeeee!

    And to those of you out there who are my boys, thanks for being there for me. You all know who you are, you’ve heard me say it a million times before, heck, I’ve even blogged about it. But still, seriously, I love you and you know it, but it never hurts to hear it again, does it?

    Merry Christmas everybody. Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day, Happy Birthday – whatever you’re celebrating, I hope it’s a happy one. 🙂